Tuesday, August 20, 2013

The Inferior Dream I still move on with what I'm blessed with. I am indeed happy with my new life. But wherever I go, or what I do... even in my rest bed or when Im asleep I see you. I dont know how is this possible. It's been a year and 2 months now, but I wish I could wipe all the memories we had together and I would be the girl that never been hurt badly. And now I see what stands before me. Im fighting for my own rights and trying to stand on my own 2 feet. See where it got me today. With the help of my partner, family and friends. I cry inside, no matter how much hurt you have caused me and scared me. The dream that I see her with you in our house that we onced lived, she being the inferior one that I could take her place, but I just couldnt go back to you nor see you face-to-face anymore. You took away something that was very precious to me, a life. And now I have to live by it every day of my life. In my dream, I drove passed the place you stay and rode a bike to hide my identity. But you reached out to me and called my name. Talking to me, asking me to come home. But she was there, coming home and being afraid that I was going to take her place. She's mentally ill and the way I see it, she needs you more than I do. I walked away with tears rolling down my cheeks and you let go of my hands. I took my helmet and wanted to ride off but you followed behind me. Why are you doing this? I asked myself... I woke up and its never real, nothings real. When I woke up, I felt more inferior because my partner wasnt there. And he left to work the same way you did. I packed my bags and ran away, thinking you would look for me. But it's all over now and I gotta look forward whats infront of me than to think that its ever gonna happen. Sometimes Im afraid that Ill ever bump into you in the malls. You know, my tears can never shed for you no more.